Thursday, June 26, 2014

What NOT To Do With a Small Polymer Gel Bead (or The Many Uses of Straws)


     So there is a new fad in floral design in the States.  Instead of filling the vase beneath a floral arrangement with water, they are now using small beads made of some sort of polymer gel that swell with water and seep moisture to keep the flowers hydrated.  I was first introduced to these little beads just a couple of weeks ago at the graduation party for my step-sister’s daughter Aubri. Aubri filled glass jars with the beads and then placed a colored battery operated tea light at the bottom of it, very neat effect! What I like best about the beads was how they felt.  They are cool and slippery and, of course, wet!  The first thing I thought of when I felt them was that if I were throwing a Halloween party and wanted to gross people out, these would make a fantastic substitute for frog eyeballs .  I spent most of the evening with my hand in one of the glass jars, rolling the beads around my fingers.

      When I was getting ready for our trip to Cairo, I found air fresheners made from these beads.  You peel the sticker off the top of the plastic jar and the lovely scents of “Crisp Linen” and “Lavender” fill the room.  If you unscrew the top you can once again roll the beads around your fingers, of course your hands will then smell strongly of air freshener.  I picked up a couple to bring with us, to make our room smell nice and because it was something new and different, most likely not here in Egypt yet.

     My son Heema (Ibrahim) has been obsessed with them.  Every time he plunks himself down on the couch, he grabs the jar, unscrews the lid and plays with the beads.  A few nights ago the boys were watching an episode of “Mr. Bean” and I was busy tip-tapping away on my computer.  Heema approached me with a smile on his face and says “Mama?  You know those round balls in the air freshener? Well I was playing with one (nervous laugh) and I put one in my ear to see if it would fit…and it did….(another nervous laugh) but now I can’t get it out………”

My tip-tapping stopped. 

I am not sure if it was the look on my face as the situation (and all its possible outcomes) swirled around my head or the sudden realization that what he had done was probably NOT the wisest choice, but a look of fear suddenly came across his face.

 “Heema, WHY would you do that??” I asked. 

“I don’t know!  I just wanted to see if it would fit.”

BOYS.  What is it with boys and their insistence on attempting things they KNOW are going to have a bad outcome?  I remember hearing a story of my father shoving a pinto bean up his nose and something about it sprouting and emitting a foul odor before he finally fessed up…..  really Dad?

     I went to find Hany and inform him what our son had managed to do.   His reaction?  He busted out laughing. The whole situation WAS rather amusing, but I had not yet reached the point that I could look back and have a good laugh. Somewhere inside my son’s head, a small polymer filled bead was bouncing around freshening his ear canal with the scent of “Crisp Linen.” I had to figure out how to get that thing out.  The first thing I did was to establish a visual.  Hany has a “flashlight” app on his iphone that I used to look down his ear.  Thankfully I could see that it was just past the narrow opening of his ear…however he had pushed it past the point of no return. (Past the point that it could return by itself anyway!)  I had him vigorously shake his head.  Nothing. I then borrowed Hany’s mom’s tweezers and after having Heema lie on his side, CAREFULLY attempted to grab and pull it out. Hany also gave it a try.  The little bead was simply too slick, I couldn’t get a hold on it and I was afraid of hurting Heema’s ear or having it break apart and have the pieces slip further into his ear.   Heema finally lost his composure when I made mention of possibly having to take him to a doctor’s office or somewhere where they would have the proper tools to extract it correctly. His eyes welled up with tears and the anxiety set in.  Hany and I decided to have a cup of coffee and talk it over, it was still very early in the morning and no doctor offices would be open for a few more hours.  As we were talking, and Heema was crying, and we were trying not to laugh at the ridiculousness of it all, Hany mentioned that maybe the doctor had some sort of “vacuum” that would pull it out.

(Gasp!)   Light bulb moment! 

“What about a STRAW?” I asked. “I’ll suck it out!”

     Hany raised his eyebrows and gave me a “Hmmm….that may just work” look.  So I began searching the drawers in the kitchen until I came across two straws of different sizes.  I practiced on a single bead and it worked perfectly, I was able to get a good grip on it using just a gentle suction, now we just needed it to work on Heema!  I had him lay down once again and gently placed the straw in his ear …I tried several time to extract it but it was no use, the straw couldn’t make the slight curvature of his ear. It was also tickling the heck out of him (I’m sure the sound of it was awful!!)  I tried with the larger straw as well and ended up pushing too hard…Heema jerked in pain. It also looked as if I had broken off a piece of it.  Ugh.  No use.  We were going to have to take him in.  Upon hearing this, Heema REALLY began to cry so I said “Allright….let me try ONE more time with the other straw.”  This time once again gently placed it in his ear but pushed a little harder on the side to try and make it around the curve, when I thought the straw was touching the bead, I sucked in and:

THWAP!!

     Woohoo!! Success!!  I had managed to suck the entire thing inside the straw!  After a round of high fives and hugs from Heema, and making sure there were no pieces left that we could see, he was unfortunately subjected to a ten minute lecture as to WHY you cannot shove things into your ears, nose…etc. I also tried to explain to him that we are not in America and they do not have Urgent Cares here. He happily listened and agreed this would never happen again. Good Lord I hope not.

Who needs a doctor when you have a mother with a straw?

 

On to the next adventure.  Inshallah.

 



 

 

 

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