What NOT To Do With a Small Polymer Gel Bead (or The Many Uses of Straws)

     So there is a new fad in floral design in the States.  Instead of filling the vase beneath a floral arrangement with water, they are now using small beads made of some sort of polymer gel that swell with water and seep moisture to keep the flowers hydrated.  I was first introduced to these little beads just a couple of weeks ago at the graduation party for my step-sister’s daughter Aubri. Aubri filled glass jars with the beads and then placed a colored battery operated tea light at the bottom of it, very neat effect! What I like best about the beads was how they felt.  They are cool and slippery and, of course, wet!  The first thing I thought of when I felt them was that if I were throwing a Halloween party and wanted to gross people out, these would make a fantastic substitute for frog eyeballs .  I spent most of the evening with my hand in one of the glass jars, rolling the beads around my fingers.

      When I was getting ready for our trip to Cairo, I found air fresheners made from these beads.  You peel the sticker off the top of the plastic jar and the lovely scents of “Crisp Linen” and “Lavender” fill the room.  If you unscrew the top you can once again roll the beads around your fingers, of course your hands will then smell strongly of air freshener.  I picked up a couple to bring with us, to make our room smell nice and because it was something new and different, most likely not here in Egypt yet.

     My son Heema (Ibrahim) has been obsessed with them.  Every time he plunks himself down on the couch, he grabs the jar, unscrews the lid and plays with the beads.  A few nights ago the boys were watching an episode of “Mr. Bean” and I was busy tip-tapping away on my computer.  Heema approached me with a smile on his face and says “Mama?  You know those round balls in the air freshener? Well I was playing with one (nervous laugh) and I put one in my ear to see if it would fit…and it did….(another nervous laugh) but now I can’t get it out………”

My tip-tapping stopped. 

I am not sure if it was the look on my face as the situation (and all its possible outcomes) swirled around my head or the sudden realization that what he had done was probably NOT the wisest choice, but a look of fear suddenly came across his face.

 “Heema, WHY would you do that??” I asked. 

“I don’t know!  I just wanted to see if it would fit.”

BOYS.  What is it with boys and their insistence on attempting things they KNOW are going to have a bad outcome?  I remember hearing a story of my father shoving a pinto bean up his nose and something about it sprouting and emitting a foul odor before he finally fessed up…..  really Dad?

     I went to find Hany and inform him what our son had managed to do.   His reaction?  He busted out laughing. The whole situation WAS rather amusing, but I had not yet reached the point that I could look back and have a good laugh. Somewhere inside my son’s head, a small polymer filled bead was bouncing around freshening his ear canal with the scent of “Crisp Linen.” I had to figure out how to get that thing out.  The first thing I did was to establish a visual.  Hany has a “flashlight” app on his iphone that I used to look down his ear.  Thankfully I could see that it was just past the narrow opening of his ear…however he had pushed it past the point of no return. (Past the point that it could return by itself anyway!)  I had him vigorously shake his head.  Nothing. I then borrowed Hany’s mom’s tweezers and after having Heema lie on his side, CAREFULLY attempted to grab and pull it out. Hany also gave it a try.  The little bead was simply too slick, I couldn’t get a hold on it and I was afraid of hurting Heema’s ear or having it break apart and have the pieces slip further into his ear.   Heema finally lost his composure when I made mention of possibly having to take him to a doctor’s office or somewhere where they would have the proper tools to extract it correctly. His eyes welled up with tears and the anxiety set in.  Hany and I decided to have a cup of coffee and talk it over, it was still very early in the morning and no doctor offices would be open for a few more hours.  As we were talking, and Heema was crying, and we were trying not to laugh at the ridiculousness of it all, Hany mentioned that maybe the doctor had some sort of “vacuum” that would pull it out.

(Gasp!)   Light bulb moment! 

“What about a STRAW?” I asked. “I’ll suck it out!”

     Hany raised his eyebrows and gave me a “Hmmm….that may just work” look.  So I began searching the drawers in the kitchen until I came across two straws of different sizes.  I practiced on a single bead and it worked perfectly, I was able to get a good grip on it using just a gentle suction, now we just needed it to work on Heema!  I had him lay down once again and gently placed the straw in his ear …I tried several time to extract it but it was no use, the straw couldn’t make the slight curvature of his ear. It was also tickling the heck out of him (I’m sure the sound of it was awful!!)  I tried with the larger straw as well and ended up pushing too hard…Heema jerked in pain. It also looked as if I had broken off a piece of it.  Ugh.  No use.  We were going to have to take him in.  Upon hearing this, Heema REALLY began to cry so I said “Allright….let me try ONE more time with the other straw.”  This time once again gently placed it in his ear but pushed a little harder on the side to try and make it around the curve, when I thought the straw was touching the bead, I sucked in and:

THWAP!!

     Woohoo!! Success!!  I had managed to suck the entire thing inside the straw!  After a round of high fives and hugs from Heema, and making sure there were no pieces left that we could see, he was unfortunately subjected to a ten minute lecture as to WHY you cannot shove things into your ears, nose…etc. I also tried to explain to him that we are not in America and they do not have Urgent Cares here. He happily listened and agreed this would never happen again. Good Lord I hope not.

Who needs a doctor when you have a mother with a straw?

 

On to the next adventure.  Inshallah.

 

 

 

 

White Knight....Dark Nights

     I have a white knight in shining armor who is never more than a few feet away from me.  His name is Carrier.  I know this because he proudly displays his name on a little blue badge located on his lower left body.  He is about two feet wide and about a foot tall.  My life here in Cairo without Carrier would be a veritable hell.  He protects me from the evil Red Dragon.   He senses when the Red Dragon has begun to mount an attack on me and my family.  His green digital eyes click and beep to life when the Dragon begins to draw near.  My Carrier comes to life with a gush of delicious cold wonderfulness that forces the Red Dragon to retreat, keeping him at bay.

“Carrier” is the air conditioning unit that is mounted on the wall of the room where I spend the majority of my time.  

I thought that description was a lot more fun than “I have an air conditioner”.    It was….right?  

     The Red Dragon is, of course, the crushing heat that threatens to drown me whenever I am brave enough to leave the cool confines of my room.  I came to Cairo armed with a ton of movies to watch on my computer and an armload of books.  I KNEW I would be spending an enormous amount of time in the bedroom where my beloved Carrier resides.

      I know I have mentioned this once before, but I will mention it again for sake of my brain’s inability to think of a better example.  There is movie called “Biloxi Blues” that came out in the 80’s that stars Matthew Broderick.  He plays a young writer named Eugene Morris Jerome who has been drafted in to the Army during World War II.  As he steps off the train in Biloxi, Mississippi to begin his basic training, he is overcome by the heat of the Deep South.  He struggles to describe it and finally comes up with “Man it's hot. It's like AFRICA hot. Tarzan couldn't take this kind of hot.” When I first heard that line, I laughed.  I never in a million years thought I would one day, quite literally, understand what that line meant. 

Good GOD it is hot here.

      It’s NOT like the heat back home.  It’s indescribable to anyone who has never experienced heat like this.  I have not spent a lot of time in any of the southern states of the U.S., but I know heat like this does exist there.  I looked like I had taken a shower a mere 15 minutes after I stepped off the plane at the Cairo airport on June 11^th.  The sweat was pouring off of me.  I of course had spent a small amount of time preening and trying to erase the 24 hours it had taken us to make the journey from Albuquerque to Cairo.  Unfortunately the dark circles and greasy hair caused by hours and hours in a packed aircraft fuselage told the real story.  I was liberal with the concealer and managed to dab on a bit of mascara as well.   As presentable as I appeared when we stepped off the bus and in to the terminal, all my cosmetic efforts slowly began to melt off my face as that famous Egyptian heat began to have its way with me. I impatiently glared at the customs man and willed him to work faster as he read paperwork, made his inquiries, and stamped the passports of those who managed to get off the plane faster than I could.  Slowly but surely we made our way to the front of the line, the whole time drops of sweat tracing their way down my face taking my makeup with it.  Sigh.  When we finished going through customs a very enthusiastic man had marked me as an American….ah…..a chance to make some REAL money.  I knew what he was up to and allowed him to hurry me along to the rotating belt in the baggage claim area.  I then allowed him to pull all five of our overly packed humongous bags off the belt and load them on to a single cart.  He then said “Please, I need twenty dollars now”.  I think I laughed out loud and then said “Wallah la zeem?  Ai-ape”…which basically translates in to “You swear to God? You are really asking me for that? That is SO wrong.”  A look of surprise registered on his face and then he slowly put his hands up and turned and walked away.  I could just hear him thinking “Damn!  Stupid American woman is on to me”.  I would have tipped him something, but he scurried away in shame before I had a chance to do so.

Twenty bucks my FOOT.

      My point in all this is that I ended up pushing the overly loaded cart through the terminal myself which did absolutely nothing for the whole sweat situation.  I was now drenched.

     We finally reunited with Hany who mercifully took over the cart and lead us out to his car where he promptly loaded us up and jacked up the air conditioner.  Ah sweet bliss!  My hair had managed to dry out some by the time we made the half hour trip to his mom’s apartment.  We said our hellos, dragged our bags in to the room and I immediately greeted my little white savior and switched him on.

     Almost immediately another Cairo truth reared its ugly head.  I became aware that my little white knight in shining armor had an even more sinister enemy that rendered him useless and allowed the Red Dragon to attack!  What was this evil force you ask?   The power outage.  Flippin power outages.  ACK!!

     “You must be kidding me”.  I think that’s what I said.

      Only a short while after we arrived from the airport, the power went out and stayed out for over an hour.  I had forgotten about the power outages. Hany giggled and said “Welcome back to Egypt baby!”  Not funny.  The strain of air conditioners on the power grid is overwhelming here, so in order to ease that strain and prevent a greater (perhaps catastrophic) outage, they must have rolling blackouts.  We have been here for six days now and we have experienced no less than 10 outages.  They last anywhere from a half hour to two hours or more.  They often occur during the heat of day when the air conditioners are in full swing and not a breath of a breeze is to be had.  Sheer, unadulterated HELL.  The temperature in the room becomes uncomfortable within minutes.  The shutters fly open and folks make their way to their balconies with their makeshift fans and glasses of ice water to sit out the outage and wait for their power to return.  I actually prefer the night time outages as at least the air is a bit cooler.  You can’t see a damn thing inside the apartment, but the street down below remains busy. Most homes now have a battery operated lighting strips that switch on when the power goes out.  Most are equipped with obnoxiously bright LED lights that will blind you if you look directly at it. I shouldn’t complain, at least we can make our way around.  I actually washed the dishes by the light of one of these small LED lights the other night.  Interesting experience!    In most cases the other side of the street is still lit as the outages usually occur on just one block at a time.  After what seems like an eternity, the power pops back on and you can audibly hear the cheers in the nearby apartments. Back to business as usual.  It seems to me that the strain on the power grid is INCREASED when they shut off the power as now every A/C and fan is immediately switched on to try and bring down the sweltering temperature.  There is no rhyme or reason for when an outage will occur.  There might be one in a single day, or maybe two.  You may go several days without a single outage. (We have had at least one a day since I have been here.)

     The power outages will be a daily inconvenience for me, but I will survive.  I will have to further arm myself with powders and creams in order to keep the sweat at bay and the heat rashes that are sure to follow if I am not diligent!  At least they are saving money on heating water as I have yet had to use a single drop of warm water while showering.  No point really as the water comes out of the shower head cold, soaks through my hair and actually runs down my back completely warmed by the heat trapped on my head!  Ahhhh……ya gotta love the experiences you have when you travel to the other side of the world.  It can be difficult, but I wouldn’t change it for anything.  Roll with the punches baby.

Goodnight my sweet Carrier.  I shall now switch you off for a few minutes as I am actually feeling chilled.  No worries, ten minutes tops and I will once again be in need of your services. 

Yes, I am a drama queen.

Looking forward to the next adventure.  Inshallah.

Back in Cairo!

Greetings from the Land of the Pyramids!

     Well the boys and I snuck off in the early morning hours of June 10^th and made our way back to Egypt for a very long awaited reunion with Hany.  It’s been so great having our little family back together. We had not seen him in 10 months.  Much too long. This will be about an 8 week visit for us.  We had initially decided that Hany would return to the States but the more I thought about it the more I realized it would be better for the boys to spend Ramadan here.  Ramadan is a holy month of fasting.  If you are able, you do not eat or drink or ingest anything from sun-up to sun down.  So what CAN you have?

 NOTHING. NADA. ZILCH!  It is a true test of your will power and faith.

     No water, meds, cigarettes, nothing that can enter your blood stream. If you are ON meds, you must take them before the day of fasting begins.  It is similar to the Catholics celebration of Lent where something is given up for 40 days, you fast and don’t eat meat on Fridays so that you can pray and reflect on all that God has blessed you with.  Same concept except you can have NOTHING from the moment the sun rises, until the moment it sets.  Every year Ramadan begins fifteen days earlier than the previous year.  It takes roughly 20+ years, but eventually it cycles through the entire year. In the years that Ramadan falls in winter, it is much easier to fast as the days are super short.  You may only have to fast 7 or 8 hours. Right now we are in the dead of summer and the fasting day will be between 16 and 17 hours.  This is an incredibly difficult task as the weather here has been bordering on “hell” for the last week. You can have NO water if you are fasting.  Cairo had a 118 degree day last week, it was 107 here yesterday. ACK!  Of course the young, the elderly, women who are pregnant or nursing, and the sick are not expected to fast.  If you are able, then you do it. 

     What I love about being here for Ramadan is that everything adjusts to the fact that folks are fasting. Businesses stay closed until after fasting stops (sundown). Doctor’s offices, specialty shops, even barbers remain closed until well after 8pm so that people can avoid being out in the hot sun.   But once the cannon “booms” (that’s how they signify that it is time to break the fast) Let the party begin! The streets remain quiet for about an hour after sunset and then slowly, as bellies are filled and thirsts are sated, the streets begin to come alive.  People will go to visit friends and family, they leave their stuffy apartments and go out in to the cooler night air to find refreshments like ice cream smothered in fruit cocktail, sweet sugar cane and fresh guava juices. MY personal favorite is the fantastic mango drinks that are made from fresh mangoes…..ice cold and full of chunky mango bits.  YUM.  You haven’t lived until you have had an EGYPTIAN mango! They are amazing! The traffic once again resumes the “normal” levels of near deadlocked streets.  Folks lay on their horns and sing from their lowered car windows. Celebrating and joyous.  Families will head to the local “clubs” (I’ll write more about those later!) where the adults will find a table near the pool and start a night of conversation over pots of tea and plates of sugary cakes and pastries. The kids hit the pool and the soccer courts.

     Fasting begins again around 4 a.m. in the morning.  Somewhere around 3 a.m., preparations begin for “Sahoor”, which is the last meal you can have before you once again must begin a long day of fasting.  Customarily, the women will make plates of eggs and pasterma (kind of like pastrami), fresh fruits and yogurts, olives and cheeses. Fresh bread.  More pots of tea are brewed and bellies once again filled to the brink of bursting.  Those that are fasting drink one last glass of water in hopes it helps get them through the long day ahead.  The sound of the “Call the Pray” over the loudspeakers from thousands of mosques across the city signifies that the time to fast has begun.

 One added bonus we have this year is the World Cup (soccer) which occurs once every four years. The games will be airing around the time of Sahoor, so those die-hard soccer fans (and there are MANY here!) will stay up and watch the scheduled match for the day. After that, it is off to bed.  Even after a full 8 hours of sleep, there will still be an additional 8 hours of fasting.  Ugh.   I personally will not be fasting this year as I am on a barrage of medication for diabetes and blood pressure.  I am too nervous to attempt it this year as I had a bad experience with my blood pressure bottoming out after a hard workout on an empty stomach.  Don’t want to risk it.  The boys will attempt to fast, but because of their ages are not expected to fast the entire day.  If they can sleep all day, they may be able to get through it.  We will see, and they are so excited to be hanging with their cousins and friends during the night time hours.  They have many sources of encouragement to help them along. It will be a great time for them.

     I guess you can see why I made the decision to come here for a couple of months.  It will be good for the boys to spend time with family. Ramadan is like Christmas Eve every day for a month.  The celebration that signifies the end of Ramadan is one of gifts and a feast of food and family. Lots of fun.  I think it would have been too difficult for us to stay up all night and sleep all day while we are in New Mexico! Much easier when everyone around you is doing the same thing that you are doing!   It is our hopes to return to the United States (with Hany!) around the first week of August so that we may once again start the school year and figure out our next move.  Hany will be begin a serious job hunt (he is actually doing that NOW) and I too will (hopefully) begin working again.  I have not had the time to write and blog as I wanted to these past few months but I will now have plenty of time to do that.  It will be fun sharing our experiences in Egypt with you.  I already have a lot to write about including the daily power outages and my son’s decision to stick something in his ear that I had to figure out how to remove.  THAT was fun.  Stay tuned!

Keep us in your prayers!  We will see y’all soon!   

Inshallah.  (God Willing)